Zorc and Pals: The One With The Confusing Circumstances - Transcript
From Yu-Gi-Oh!
Cast (In order of appearance): Zorc, Bakura, Zorc's Mother, Marik
Date: April 1, 2008
Running Time: 4:48
Title: Zorc and Pals: The One With The Confusing Circumstances
[edit] Transcript
Cheers theme song
BAKURA: Zorc and Pals is filmed before a dead studio audience.
BAKURA: It's 8 o'clock and Zorc still hasn't finished destroying the world. That man has some explaining to do.
Canned laughter
ZORC: Honey, I'm home.
Canned Applause
BAKURA: Zorc, what time do you call this?
ZORC: Time to destroy the world.
Canned Laughter
BAKURA: Actually it's 9 o'clock.
ZORC: Well you know what I say. Anytime is a good time to destroy the world.
BAKURA: I expected you home 3 hours ago. Your dinner has gone cold.
ZORC: O'Oh, I think I'm in trouble.
Canned Laughter
BAKURA: Why were you out so late?
ZORC: Because I just learned that my mother is coming to visit.
Dum Dum DUUUUUUMM
Canned Laughter
BAKURA: You never mentioned you had a mother.
ZORC: That's because she hates me.
Awwwwwwwwww
BAKURA: Why would anybody hate you, Zorc?
ZORC: Because I destroyed the world.
Canned Laughter
ZORC: She wanted me to grow up to become a lawyer. Imagine the shame she must feel, knowing that I bring about the deaths of millions of people.
BAKURA: Yes, she must really despise you.
Canned Laughter
ZORC: Well not anymore. When my mother shows up, I want you to pretend that I'm a successful lawyer and that I don't destroy worlds.
BAKURA: You've got to be kidding me.
Canned Laughter
Knock knock knock
ZORC: That must be her now! Remember, I'm a lawyer.
BAKURA: Right. I think I got it.
ZORC'S MOTHER: Hello Zorkie poo! How is my little demon child today?
ZORC: I'm good mother. In fact I'm better than good, I am a lawyer!
Canned Laughter
BAKURA: It's true, he's a lawyer. A huge blue lawyer.
ZORC'S MOTHER: Oh, my goodness! Imagine that. My Zorkie poo, a lawyer.
ZORC: Yes, I do law things!
Canned Laughter
ZORC'S MOTHER: Oh Zorkie poo, I'm so proud! slight pause Aren't you going to introduce me to your wife?
ZORC: My...wife?
ZORC'S MOTHER: Yes, your wife. I made it very clear that I wanted you to get married by the time you were 30.
ZORC: But mother, I'm 5,000,000 years old.
ZORC'S MOTHER: Well all the more reason to get married then. You're no spring chicken.
Canned Laughter
ZORC: Yes, well I did have a wife.
ZORC'S MOTHER: You did? What happened?
ZORC: I destroyed her!
Canned Laughter
ZORC'S MOTHER: What are you talking about, Zorkie poo? You're a lawyer. Lawyers don't destroy things.
ZORC: What? Oh, um.... No okay I didn't destroy her then.
ZORC'S MOTHER: Then where is she?
ZORC: Um... She's right over there.
BAKURA: What?
ZORC: Hello honey!
Canned Laughter
ZORC'S MOTHER: Oh, so you must be Zorc's wife.
BAKURA: (frustrated) Uhhh, yes... I am Zorc's wife?
Canned Laughter
BAKURA: Pleasure to meet you.
ZORC'S MOTHER: Oh, the pleasure's all mine.
ZORC: My wife and I were just about to have sex before you came in.
ZORC'S MOTHER: Oh, how wonderful!
Canned Laughter
ZORC: ... I am a Lawyer.
Canned Laughter and applause
BAKURA: Zorc...
ZORC: What is it, darling?
BAKURA: How long do you think you can keep up this bloody charade? Everyone knows I'm not your wife.
ZORC'S MOTHER: You're not his wife?
BAKURA: Of course not, it's bloody obvious!
Canned Laughter
MARIK: Hold everything!
BAKURA: Marik? How did you get here?
MARIK: With science! And I bring urgent news: Bakura is not Zorc's wife... I am!
Dum Dum DUUUUUUMM
Canned Laughter
ZORC: Oh, yeah! I got married to Marik! I forgot all about that!
More Canned Laughter
BAKURA: Zorc, you've got some explaining to do.
ZORC: O'Oh, I think I'm in trouble.
Canned Laughter
[edit] References
- The episode title is a reference to the TV show Friends, whose episode titles all begin with "The One where/with/when".
- Bakura's line, "You've got some explaining to do" is a Ricky's line from the '50's sitcom I Love Lucy.
